Domonique Echeverria’s story is one of strength and growth and is far from done evolving. This beloved nightlife queen, artist, and fashion designer saw her world turned upside down after a failed suicide attempt in November 2015 that left her as a double amputee. Today she is flourishing, expanding her knowledge as a healer and, in turn, healing herself. Domonique talks to us about her spirituality, sexuality, and what she has planned for the future.
What does it mean to be a Shaman or a healer?
Shamans are healers, but not all healers are shamans. Shamans are healers who work with spirits and universal energy through ritual for the purpose of healing and protection. Shamans are spiritual guides, vessels to hold space for you, they are the original doctors. Our elders teach us that we are original medicine, everything we need to know is coded in our bones by our ancestors, you know what is best for you, you have the ability to heal yourself, my job is to just help your mind, body, and soul get into that space. Healing energy has different names and come in different forms, Creator, God/Goddess, spirit guides, Orishas, ascended masters, angels, ancestors, Mother Earth, etcetera.
I am multiracial, and come from a very unique background, so I am fluid with my choice of words when I talk about spirituality, so it doesn't matter who you are, where you are from, I can help get you there in a way that feels safe and comfortable to you. I don't fit in anywhere, so why should I force or allow stagnation with anyone else? My mother is Choctaw Native and European, my father is Puerto Rican, Guatemalan, Mayan, Mexican and Basque, and this mix of indigenous blood is what has inspired the way I perform ritual and practice my work.
There are many different kinds of shamans and healers all over the world, healers and clairvoyants run in my family on both sides, I have physically died and healed myself, and I have also trained and worked with many healers and shamans from all walks of life. The combination of wisdom, knowledge, blood and life experience I have is very unique to say the least.
In your opinion, what are some of the attitudes or actions that our society demonstrates that need to be healed or changed?
If everyone could learn to be present with themselves they wouldn't need to juggle distractions to avoid their personal trauma and the trauma around them. Addictions to drugs, alcohol, food, sex, technology, work, love, drama are all a result of the inability to be present with one's self. Addictions are comfortable and reliable at first, and then they're not. People do everything they can to distract themselves.
When we aren't present with our trauma, our emotions, reality, our minds go into survival mode which can look like anxiety, depression, sadness, envy, codependency, paranoia or anger, rage, and destruction. Even if we had the perfect leaders worldwide, would the people change? Or are they so stuck in their trauma, are WE so afraid of being present, that we will do everything we can to harmfully distract ourselves from reality?
How has your spiritual practices affected sex and intimacy?
It's always changing, as I am changing. I was born confident in my body and have always allowed myself to indulge in pleasure, sometimes too much. When I was younger I found power in it, and realized early on that I was able to channel a certain kind of energy that not all women were able to channel with their lovers. However, I was irresponsible and ignorant at first and didn't understand the way that energy exchange really worked, before I became a healer I didn't understand boundaries, both mine and theirs. Just like with STDs, it's important for people to not only protect their energy when being intimate, but take responsibility for their own energy that you are transmitting, both in bed and at the grocery store or on the subway.
Now that I am almost 30 and am more aware of the power I have, and how open and vulnerable I am as a healer, I am much more selective with who I allow in my space, for my safety and theirs, because I can be succubus at times, and my intention is never to harm people, and in the same breath, I am an extremely sensitive creature. Right now I am going through another level of training, and as I go deeper, I find myself not wanting to be intimate with anyone.
I had a lover over a few days ago and the moment I came, I wanted him out of my house hahaha! It was someone I love very much, and he loves me very much, but my soul rejected it, it wants to focus on growing not making love connections right now. My relationship with this person is very evolved and they are confident enough to give me space when I need it, which I'm grateful for.
Has sex changed for you in other ways since your accident?
Yes of course, my mind and body are very different. Before I was amputated, I was known for having very voluptuous curves, and I absolutely played along with my lovers' desire and appreciation for it, I was more dominantly submissive, and indulged in their desire to possess and devour me and attracted very playful lovers. . .but at times I felt like a walking fetish. It was exhausting being fetishized 24/7 everywhere I went.
I usually wore large kaftans to run errands and kimonos to hide my body, not because I was ashamed, but because it was annoying being followed and catcalled everyday. I'm much more than a play thing. When I was bed-ridden I lost a lot of weight, a lot of it was muscle in my ass and legs and my body has over all changed a lot. Yes I am a double amputee now, but I'm also slimmer, my hips aren't 52" anymore, my ass and tits are smaller, parts of me are more toned and bony, my hair is 11 inches shorter, my face has more structure, my eyes more intense, my skin is darker, my style more simple. I'm a different version of myself.
I was very fortunate to have such a supportive and loving partner at the time of the accident. Even with bloody wounds while I was locked in the psyche ward, bed ridden, he kissed me all over my body and reminded me I was beautiful and magical, he broke the spell of insecurity before I allowed the thought of, "I'm hideous, no one will want me", to even cross my mind and for that I will always be grateful, he was a good man.
After I moved to LA and found myself single again I was very skeptical of the people who hit on me. It took me a while to stop assuming that every guy that hit on me had an amputee fetish! Sounds ridiculous, but its a rational fear, especially since I have experience in the fetish world and know when I'm being fetishized or if someone is attracted to my energy. There's a big difference, and being an amputee is very new for me, and there was new insecurity attached to that.
Once I got over that, and healed a bit more overall, I started to allow new lovers into my space. I've always had an unusual body, and as an artist, I love having a new body to explore and adorn. I find that sexually I'm much more dominant now, and tend to attract people who appreciate my dominance, in a different way than before. I'm trying to save the world right now, so I'm keeping my love affairs light and selective.
What practices or tips would you recommend to people when it comes to strengthening their sexual energy and balance to your life?
1. Protect your energy, just as you protect your body. You never know what kind of dark shit is attached to the sweetest faces. I love protection oils, I prefer a mixture of black pepper oil, frankincense, African jasmine, and a secret blend my friend Shine Blackhawk brewed for me to protect my heart. If you are very sensitive, I recommend calling in protection energy around you. Whether I'm going out dancing, going to the store or having a lover over, I ground my senses and go through the process of protecting my energy field. You can come up with your own protection ritual, or you can find guidance from the healers and seers on my site, www.universalmother.love, I like to keep my particular protection rituals secret, but always happy to help clients come up with their own.
2. Cleanse your energy for yourself and for your lovers. It's hard to enjoy the company of another person with negative energy attached to either of you, passing the misery and projection back and forth. Greet your lover with your grounded self, with loving and positive energy, be a mirror for the energy you want presented back to you.
3. Stand in your power, if you don't know how, learn. From who? Yourself, learn to be present with your insecurities, listen to your gut instincts, let go of what doesn't serve you, you don't have room for it. There is nothing sexier than a confident person who knows how to stand in their power. Don't like something about yourself? Why? What are solutions? Do you want to change that part of yourself, ok, what steps do you need to take? Focus on solutions.
4. Manifest and set intentions. We focus on what we want too much, but what do you need, and are you being satisfied the way you need, not the way you want? Spend moments of your day to set positive intentions, and find out what you really need.
Tell us about the creation of Universal Mother. How did it come into fruition?
The world is not gentle to it's mothers, and often times mother's don't have the skills and wisdom we need, because there was not enough space for them to grow into the evolved beings they were meant to become, they were kept small. I wanted to create a website that can be reached globally, and no matter what you are going through, you can find an answer to guide you out of it. Whether you have physical health issues, mental issues, addiction, a broken heart or spiritual torment, this site will lead you in the right direction.
The site includes yoga videos, earth medicine suggestions, links to astrology sites, trusted healers, book suggestions, healthy coping mechanisms, sound therapy, inspirational videos, sanctuaries and safe spaces, and it's growing every day. I launched this site 1 year after my suicide attempt, for anyone who is suffering and needs help. I have been through hell and back, and have lived many lives, and in this lifetime, it is my honor and my responsibility to guide people out of their suffering. I didn't read it in some book, I didn't discover how from just one person, my life has been a voyage searching how to heal from trauma. I called my friend Gabriel and begged him to teach me how to build a site, he gave me a few pointers, and I uploaded as much content as I could in 2 weeks. Every book on there, I've read, every healer and seer, I've worked with, every earth medicine suggested I've taken myself, every piece of music I have up is for a reason, I curated this for you, for us, for our future generations. Who do we turn to when we don't know who to trust, where do we go when our mothers don't have the answer?
What do you see in your future and the future of Universal Mother?
One day, I hope to have a few Universal Mother safe houses, to take people in, heal them, and send them back into the world to heal others. I want to keep doing what I'm doing but magnify it, I want to keep growing.
Her Instagram - @domonique_echeverria