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How To Pick A Toy

So you're ready to buy yourself a toy! Where the heck do you start? To answer the question "What toy should I get?", you first need to ask yourself some questions. Read the following questions, write down your answers as you go, and when you're finished, you'll have a custom list of needs that your new toy must meet. Use this list with you when you shop and use it as a reference for your decision. 

 

Where?

First question - where is this toy going to be used on your body? Think about your anatomy and what areas of your body you want to stimulate. Feel free to venture out into other erogenous zones other than your genitals. Are there multiple areas you’d like to stimulate?

Do you plan on sharing this toy with a partner and what is their anatomy? It’s not uncommon, especially with toys made from non-porous materials that can be sterilized completely, for people to share toys during masturbation and/or partnered play. If this is the case, ask your toy buddy to help you answer these questions.


Examples:

“I’d only be using this toy for anal play during masturbation to stimulate my prostate.” Check out the Aneros Eupho Trident Prostate Toy for an unmatched prostate stimulation. 

“My partner and I both have vaginas but I like internal vibrations while my partner only wants external.” The We-Vibe Rave is great for internal or external vaginal vibrations. 

“I want something that feels good on my penis but also good on my partner’s vagina.” Ideal for PIV penetration, the We-Vibe Sync offers stimulation for both partners. 


When?

Next, when are you going to be using this toy? Is it for partnered sex, masturbation, both? Think about all the circumstances where’d you want your toy to make an appearance. Will it live in your dresser drawer? Will it accompany you in your bag on a business trip or on your next Tinder date?


Examples:

“I want a toy that I can use by myself when my partner is out of town.” The Avant Summer Fling Dildo is the perfect companion. 

“I’d like a sleeve I can travel with easily.” The Fleshlight Quickshot Vantage Masturbator is smaller and more portable than most sleeves. 

“I want a toy that can be keep in my bedside table for when my boyfriend spends the night for us to use together.” The We-Vibe Verge is a cock ring that stimulates the wearers prostate as well as stimulating the receiver with the shared vibrations. 

How?

Think about the kind of sensations you enjoy and what truly gets you aroused. Do you like deep and hard penetration? Are you partial to light sensitive touch in all the right places? Even if you’re completely new to masturbation or sex, most of us prefer different amounts of pressure and touch. Think about how hard you like to hug someone, how do you like to get a massage, or if you’re easily tickled. Though these aren't perfect indicators, it does give you an insight into sensations you prefer. Using these observations, ask yourself if you’d enjoy a toy that penetrates, vibrates or maybe both.

Another part of the 'how' is your positions. Do you masturbate on your stomach and therefore need something that can slip between your body and the bed? Do you prefer to stand and therefore will benefit from a toy with a strong grip or a tether? If you’re using it for partnered sex, think about the position you and your partner(s) frequently use and how a toy could fit into that.


Examples:

“Deep and hard G-spot penetration is what gets me off.” Experience the renown Njoy Pure Wand for G-spot and P-spot penetration. 

“I prefer a really light touch at the beginning, and then something to get progressively stronger...but not too much.” Feel the flutter of the Fun Factory Volta. 

 

“I like the sensation of oral sex and want that in a toy.” Try the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration


Special Needs?

Think about your specific needs that the toy would need to accommodate. For many, how loud a motor in a vibrator is can be a concern, especially in shared living spaces. Would having a waterproof toy be beneficial for any shower or bath time play you like to have? If you live with an physical disabilities or pain, would it help to have a toy with a handle or that does the penetrating for you? Furthermore think about the other items you’ll be using during sex. Make sure the lube that you prefer doesn’t affect the material of the toy. If so, maybe expand your lube selection.


Examples:

“I have roommates so I need a masturbating sleeve that is discreet looking.” Try the ever so discreet Fleshlight Flight Pilot Masturbator

“Sometimes my partner and I play in the shower so it would be nice if our toy was waterproof.” The Femme Funn Ultra Bullet is 100% waterproof and 100% fun. 

“I have a hard time gripping toys so my vibrator needs to accommodate that.” Try the Dame Fin Vibrator with it's optional tether. 

Price?

What’s your budget? There are often options to accommodate all financial needs and desires, no matter what the toy is. Even if you’re on a tighter budget, you should still expect body-safe materials and a good working product. As with most things, the more you spend, the more quality and features you’re going to enjoy. A higher price point can mean remotes, smartphone apps, warranties, motor strength, amount of patterns and rhythms. When selecting a figure, give yourself a range to work with i.e under $50, or between $100 and $150, and be sure to factor in shipping costs. At Wild Flower, all orders over $99 ship totally free!


Examples:

“I’m trying vibrating anal toys for the first time and I don’t know if I’ll like it so I don’t want to spend too much.” - Check out the Luxe Discover Butt Plug for a great first time anal vibe. 

“I want the best toy I can find. I plan on having this toy for a long time.” The Lelo Smart Wand is amazing quality combined with luxury features. 

 

“I really want to try a wand but I don’t want to pay over $60 for it.” Try the Noje W3 Mini Wand for maximum power in a small package. 


Some Extra Advice

Be open to new designs, styles or types of sensations.

There are constantly new innovative designs being introduced to the sex toy market. Just because these style seems unfamiliar, don’t be quick to dismiss them. Yes, classic toys are classic for a reason, but a new design, shape, or style might be the winner for your pleasure.

Look at reviews

There are many review sites out there that give honest, in depth and unbiased reviews of toys. There are also many reviews on manufacturer's and retailer's websites. While reviews are a great thing to take into consideration, know that your body and your experience maybe different.

Where you buy your toy

Avoid buying your toys from big box retailers like Amazon. These retailers don't have body-safe requirements for their sex toys, nor do they regulate knock-offs and fake reproductions. 

Hold on to your packaging for at least 30 days

Though most toy retailers have strict return or exchange policies (understandably), hold on the packaging just in case you toys breaks. We offer an exchange for broken toys within 30 days and if your toy comes with a warranty, manufacturers will have you covered for much longer.

Take care of your toy

A toy will only keep take care of your sexual needs if you keep taking care of it. Use the correct lube for the material of your toy (more information here), and store it in a clean, dry, and protected place out of direct sunlight. Take the time to wash your toy correctly right when you get it and between sessions and partners. Check out our post “How do I clean my toy?” to make sure you refresh your toy in the correct ways.

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